Nurturing My Life in 2025

2024 was the year I went into hiding.

I was just coming off three, back-to-back young adult book releases in 2021, 2022, and 2023, and I was totally fried — mentally and emotionally. I was so fortunate to have had significant support for my books from my publishing team, but I was also working full time, being a mom, and saying “yes” to everything. I pushed myself too hard and I needed a break.

So, I cancelled my pending publishing contract for two additional YA books, made a post on social saying I was pulling back from events and promptly stopped checking those apps, removed my contact forms from my website, and essentially burrowed into a hole.

Which is not to say I did nothing.

I worked on edits for my forthcoming YA book, “Get Real Chloe Torres”; I released my debut middle grade novel, “Camp Sylvania: Moon Madness,” with New York Times-bestselling author Julie Murphy; I blurbed a bunch of books; I won the Massachusetts Book Award for “The Fall of Whit Rivera” (!!!); and I left a toxic job and started a new one where I’m much happier.

I also journaled, focusing on taking everything really, really slow.

Pages from my 2024 journal

Overall, I did less.

But I felt very, very guilty about it. Who was I, if not the things I made and did?

I thought people would think I was failing with a capital F.

Mostly because I felt like I had failed.

For those reasons, I couldn’t stomach looking at social media. Posts by fellow authors (most whom I adore) left me feeling horrible about myself. I couldn’t even read young adult books because it reminded me I wasn’t writing, and I felt so ashamed of it.

But then I read a wonderful essay by my pal Kelly Jensen called, “You Can Do Less.”

She wrote:

I have been in a hurry for years to make everything that wasn’t working fit into spaces they weren’t meant to go. My mind, my body, and my spirit have suffered. Listening to those internal cues and calls and drives is all I need to do, and I do not need to make excuses for honoring my inner nature. My inner wants.

It is not a waste to spend the evening in bed with television, and it’s not a virtue to cram in more than you’ve given the space to. Our seasons of life do not define us; we define the seasons. For me, this is the season of cutting back, of not being tethered to a calendar of events, of dropping more balls than usual. Of wondering if it’s anxiety or depression or grief or some other secret fourth thing or understanding this is just what it is to be in this moment without trying to carve it into something it otherwise cannot be.

If it feels like too much, it probably is.

The whole piece is beautiful and you should absolutely read it.

It helped me realize I needed to figure out a way to be okay Not Doing Stuff. Capitalism only thrives, after all, when we’re wanting and needing more, more, more. So, what if we didn’t?

I share this not to say I have all the answers — I very much don’t — but to acknowledge that some years are harder than others. 2024 was very much that for me. I still haven’t determined how to be fine with just being, but I’m working on it.

To help with that, I’ve chosen “nurture” as my word of the year for 2025, in hopes I can work toward taking better care of the things I love the most, including myself.

A People Magazine Appearance

One highlight from 2024 was this People Magazine article, written by author of the “The Donut Prince of New York” Allen Zadoff.

He interviewed authors who write about fat characters to discuss why fat and plus-size representation matters. He graciously extended an invitation to me to be part of the piece, alongside Julie Murphy, Renée Watson, and Yehudi Mercado.

Allen wrote a wonderful article, and I’m so thankful to have been included! Read it here.

The Best Dog There Ever Was

The most painful moment of 2024 was having to say goodbye to our sweet dog, Obi, who passed away on Dec. 6 at almost 13 years old. The grief has been all-encompassing, more than I ever even imagined.

I find myself missing even the smallest things — the sound of his nails clacking against the hardwood floors, the jingle of his collar, and even how stinky his breath could get. I miss his snuggles, his warmth, and his constant presence.

He was such an integral part of my and my husband’s life for the 12+ years that we had him. Life without him has been dimmer, but I know he is pain-free and at rest now.

Things I’m Loving

• I just found out the Libby app lets you send library books to your Kindle, and my life is forever changed for the better. Arthur Read was not wrong when he sang, “Having fun isn’t hard when you’ve got a library card.”

• Like I mentioned, journaling is something I got back into in 2024. It took me a couple of months to figure out how I wanted to journal, but I eventually settled on a collage-style that feels therapeutic, celebratory, and creative. I love it, and I’m continuing to do it in 2025. For those wondering, this year’s notebook is from Vivid Scribbles. It’s A5 size with dotted paper and there is no bleed through with my Paper Mate Flair pens, so I’m basically living the dream.

• Bad Bunny and his new album, “Debí Tirar Más Fotos,” is a stunning love letter to Puerto Rico and its history. The accompanying short film is beautiful, and I’ve spent lots of time crying at the #DTMF edits on TikTok.

Current…

• eBook: “Love at Full Tilt” by Jenny L. Howe

• Audiobook: “The Third Gilmore: A Memoir” by Kelly Bishop

• Obsession: Catching up on “The Great British Bake Off”

Final Thoughts

As we gear up for inauguration day, do whatever you’ve gotta do to survive. Hang in there, my friends, and be sure to nurture yourself.

XOXO